the happiest they've ever been
by Nessotherly
Summary: The rules were never spoken, but they respected them anyway - no touching, no speaking, no opening their eyes, and no showing the other how good it actually felt. Until the rules could no longer be applied. Or, the one where Sora and Riku have helped each other get off for a long time until things escalate very quickly. SoRiku, PwP, VERY explicit content.


Hi y'all (et tout le monde), it's been ages since I've posted anything on this website, therefore I'm giving you today a smol PwP fic. I can't believe i'm back to this fandom, 10 years later. Oh well. It happens.

Have fun.

 **Disclaimer:** the characters don't belong to me, yada yada.

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Sora groans as the tip of Riku's cock presses against his hole, and he fists his hands on the sheets, shivering as he struggles to get some air into his lungs.

Riku doesn't say anything - he never does, or tries not to ever speak when they end up playing this game. But this time, things are not like they used to be. Things had been different the last couple of times. Stranger. Really — weirder. _Louder_. The rules had been tacit, and they'd always respected them. They did not talk, not during their exchange of … _services_ , and they did not ever discuss it afterwards. Sora had tried, once. Had barely blurted a 'So, about last…' before stopping as he saw his friend's expression turning to excruciating fear. He'd mumbled something about Riku having forgotten to return a game, and they'd quickly changed the subject to something else.

Four years had passed. They hadn't seen much of each other in the meantime, anyway. Both had been busy fighting the darkness and cloaked villains for the past three years, their paths endlessly crossing without ever managing to find each other. Sora couldn't even remember the last time they'd had their hands down each other's pants before all of this. But he knows they had. Constantly, at every sleep-over and lazy lonely afternoons on the beach ever since their puberty had kicked off.

He doesn't remember, really, how it all started. Riku probably doesn't, either. But Sora remembers coming for the first time - biting on his pillow to muffle his surprised moans as Riku awkwardly pumped his cock up and down, oblivious to Sora's hypersensitivity until he had to physically wrestle him out of him to stop hurting. Of course, it had all been new, and intoxicating. And wrong. Sora has felt sick to his stomach for a whole week after that, until it happened again, and again, accidentally, always - either his or Riku's hand going down the other's briefs and rubbing against already hard cocks. That's all it was, they didn't touch each other, because otherwise, it would have been _too_ weird. Only their arms crossing over each other as they mutually pumped their flesh up and down, up and dowb, awkwardly, and remaining as still as possible, controlling their breath or hiding it under the pillow, and never, _ever_ , showing the other how good it actually felt.

That was dumb, because they both _knew_. It was just pretence. But the shame overshadowed all good sense and it was better to bluff than to let the other any glimpse into something so shameful. They were ashamed. They were _boys_ , and boys were not supposed to do that.

Until they did, over and over again.

Sora doesn't know how they managed to remain friends despite their secretive activities at night. But they did - they joked and played and fought for Kairi's attention and planned for future adventures as if whatever happened under the cover of their blankets belonged to someone else, a dark and twisted alter-ego who just longed for the release of built up energy and - and _feelings_.

But they never admitted it, and Sora had only come to realise it very recently. He'd stumbled on his knees when he'd found his friend back, as if his blood was answering the call of Riku's all too familiar body. Of his hands, which he couldn't let go of. He didn't like it, didn't like it one bit, how it had chocked him up and revealed that very same vulnerability they'd tried to hide for years. And that was _stupid_ , because Sora was never afraid to show his emotions, to show the universe how much he could feel and love his friends. He never hid anything. Except from Riku.

There seemed to have been a click. Something had been unlocked. It was ironic, really, because all that had seemed to matter in the dream worlds was to open forgotten locks, again and again and again. To what avail. It had all turned sour, and wrong. Everything was wrong, the nightmares and the plotting and the manipulation and _how could he ever face his friends again?_

He'd almost died, lost it to the darkness. And it had felt strange, it was not what he'd expected it to be like. It had felt _normal_ , as a logical conclusion to all of the pain. He'd wanted it. Everything hurt - the loss of his friends and the daunting knowledge that all of this time, he had not really been himself.

But he was, and Sora knew that he didn't deserve that, and the accompanying guilt still had left a sour taste in his mouth, even after he'd come back, even after finding out Riku had been protecting him all of this time, close yet still so far, a couple of realities away.

'Stop— stop it, Riku, stop, it fucking _hurts_ , wait—' Sora says, lurching on the bed as the burning becomes too much for him to handle, and he needs a break, just a few moments, just so he can convince himself the pain will become worth it. Probably. That this is worth it, this new development of their nightly services, that it doesn't have to mean anything, although it probably should. It's okay if it doesn't, though. The services never mean anything, he knows it. And what if Riku wants more? He can handle it, he knows it. Riku's cock slowly slides out of him, and Sora hisses. This hurts, a lot. How is anyone supposed to enjoy it, he wonders. But it's okay. He can do it, he knows he can.

'You're not okay.' Riku had stated, a few nights ago as Sora had come out of the shower squeaky clean, his skin still radiating steam from abuse of the running water. He'd been looking around for his bag, avoiding Riku's gaze. Not that he was embarrassed. He just - just wanted to be left alone, just so he could think, and not feel like his life was nothing more than a crowded, undeserved mess. Riku felt like it the most, like him and the people hidden inside of him functioned as a pointed finger. He just wanted to be left _alone_.

'I am.' he'd replied, sliding his briefs up his legs under the towel. He quickly got rid of it, found his pyjamas and went for bed, turning off his light and pushing the covers up to his forehead. 'Good night, Riku.'

Riku had been sitting in his own small bed against the window, reading whatever history book he'd managed to find in the tower. Sora had closed his eyes - he'd just wanted to sleep, and for Riku to let it _go_. It would have passed during the night, he'd been sure of it. He'd be back to his usual self in the morning.

But Riku hadn't listened to him - he never did. He'd slipped into his bed and thrown his covers on the ground, fighting Sora's attempts at getting him off his lap. But Riku had pinned him down to the mattress and slipped his hand in his boxers and oh - it had felt like nothing else they'd ever done before. Riku's weight on top of him, his eyes - open, they never were open, that was the rule, they had to keep their eyes _closed_ \- locked on his own, on his face and lips and throat, as he spoke - _spoke -_ his concern turned into anger at Sora's stubbornness.

And even better - no, _worse -_ he'd let go of his cock, stumbling back on the bed to rest in between Sora's legs, and he had taken it all into his mouth, holding himself up from the sides of his chest, careful not to touch him because it was already _too much_ touching, too much hotness and slickness and intimacy, and Sora had though he'd die right here and there and it wasn't long before he exploded in Riku's mouth. Riku had just pointedly looked at him one last time, pupils dilated and mouth covered in Sora's _filth_ , and it had been too much, too much for Sora to handle. He'd closed his eyes and covered his face with his arms, turned on his side and rested there, waiting for Riku to get off the bed, for everything to come back to the way it was. But Riku didn't, Riku had lied next to him, like when they were kids, and forced him to reveal his face, and pushed him back to face him and _look_ at him. It had been difficult - and slowly, the shame had replaced arousal once more, and he had felt grateful. His mind was clearer, and it was only the two of them again, not himself and the tenants of his heart and the rest of the world. Just Sora and Riku, and Sora tried it - tried to give Riku back whatever he'd given him, and sucked and kissed and licked his cock for the first time - and enjoyed it.

Enjoyed it very much.

So much in fact that he'd been unable to look at Riku the following day, his face going crimson at every chance, and he'd tripped more than once on his feet while practice-sparring with Lea because he _knew_ Riku was watching him, even though he was apparently busy going over Kairi's moves. And when night had come, one look from Riku had sufficed to send him on his knees and to suck him dry against the wall, only to have him receive Riku's gratitude as he laid on his back on the rug.

Riku had taken his time, playing with Sora's patience, bringing him to the verge of one, two, three orgasms and stopping again, humming his content at Sora's frustrated moans mixed in with his gasps for air - he didn't even _think_ of hiding them anymore. And Riku had moaned freely before when he'd had his own dick in his mouth, and it had been — okay, yes, it had been _okay_ and _informative_ because then Sora could know what he liked, that Riku's breath would hitch when he rolled his tongue underneath the tip of his cock, and that his moans became truly indecent whenever Sora tried to get it all of the way back in his throat.

And the next night - _this night_ , how did they even come to this _situation -,_ after an entire day looking forward to lights out, Sora had found himself sprawled on Riku's bed, moaning and whining as Riku sucked the life out of him, until he'd felt _something_ pushing at the entrance of his ass and he'd yelped out of surprise, only to have Riku firmly place his hand on top of his mouth and glare at him.

'Be quiet. I don't want the others to hear us.'

And the thought of anyone hearing them going at — _whatever this was,_ sent a shiver along his spine and a surge of pleasure down his cock, and he arched his back against Riku's wet fingers, groaned and wailed as he kept on sucking him while twisting and pushing his fingers inside him and the sound of it echoing in the room was _filthy_ and _hot_ and Sora didn't know what to do with his hands. Should he hold on to the bed or his own hair or Riku's hand or —

His hips were moving of their own accord, thrusting into Riku's mouth and making him gag and Sora couldn't help his cries of pleasure whenever his cock seemed to slip into Riku's throat and he didn't think - didn't think of it at all, he swears, but as he felt his orgasm building at an alarming rate, he grabbed on to Riku's hair and held him _there_ as he came and came and came, and Riku's fingers kept on slithering inside of him, pressing into that weird point that lit his loins on _fire._ He let go of Riku's hair and tried to find his composure again, panting and focusing on his breath as Riku rested his head on his thigh, looking up at him with an indecipherable expression - content, maybe. His fingers were still lazily curling inside his ass and Sora moaned quietly, once, twice, as his heartbeat finally dropped down to a reasonable rate, only to speed up again as Riku said —

'I want to fuck you.'

Sora remained silent - _looked_ at him, really did, breath catching in his throat as he took on the full glory that was _Riku,_ how handsome he was in the golden lighting of this perpetual twilight, and slowly nodded a quiet _yes, please do_.

And now, Riku presses against him once more, slowly, very slowly, his hands barely holding on to Sora's hips but still shaking, as if trying to restore balance to the situation, stifle the enormity of what they were about to do by bringing the touch to a minimum. Sora couldn't help but chuckle - that was stupid. There probably wasn't anything in the entire universe more intimate than the kind of _touching_ they were currently doing.

Well — maybe there was. But they hadn't crossed that line yet. And they wouldn't. Because then — it would be bad, wouldn't it?

Sora hisses at the burn - they're using some oil Riku has gotten out of _somewhere_ , he doesn't even want to know, but it doesn't help, and he tries to breathe, really tries —

'It's okay, love. Just breathe —'

He does. He tries to relax his muscles, and they seem to melt under Riku's touch as he slowly presses his chest against his back — well, _that's new_ —, and the heat emanating his skin is enough to send the world twirling before Sora's very eyes. Riku's face is pressing right against the joint of his shoulder and neck, and he can feel the ghost of Riku's breath on it, and wishes that he could just kiss him there already.

Riku's pushed all the way back inside and is panting against his skin - Sora still feels full, way too full and uncomfortable. 'Are you okay' Riku asks, and Sora manages to whisper a small 'Yes, carry on.' And it is so strange to speak, either because they're not supposed to or because he's just feeling too many things right now to be able to process anything that comes out of his mouth. And Riku slowly slides out of him again, groaning as if it were the hardest thing he'd ever done in his life - and as Sora arches his back in pain again, his friend slides in once more —

'You can do it, love.' he says again, pressing his lips against his throat, and Sora moans his surprise, and once more as Riku hits the _thing_ and stars come flying before his eyes. 'Gosh — Sora, I — _fuck_ ' and Riku slowly increases the rhythm, moaning at every thrust, panting hard, hot and cold against his skin, and all Sora can do is to lie face flat on the bed, taking Riku's cock in as well as he can, his arms to weak to support him anymore. But Riku doesn't let him, Riku wraps himself around his back and slides a hand in between his legs and strokes his length in long strides, and Sora is still sentitives there and he hisses as pleasure and pain mingle, and he cannot believe how _turned on_ he is.

Riku pulls him up in his arms and with one forceful thrust that forces a whimper out of him, and he is pushed against the wall where he can support himself up again, and the angle and friction is just _right_ now and incoherent sounds and words are now escaping his mouth, a bit too loudly — Riku puts his hand over his mouth again, slips in a finger or two and Sora can only suck on them as if to tether himself to the moment.

'— like it, do you like it? Sora—ahh. Fuck.'

'Yes —'

Riku keeps on stroking his cock, and the pleasure is more than he can process. For what seems like an eternity, his world revolves around the rhythm of their bodies meeting each other at every thrust and Riku's sighs. He can feel the pleasure building up again, but Riku suddenly stops. Sora guesses that he has to, as Riku slides off him, out of breath, but he doesn't stop his touching — keeps sliding his hand up and down his length, almost lazily, reassuringly. They remain like that for a few minutes in silence, and Sora is almost afraid to break the moment as he slowly turns his head to the left, to try and take a look at Riku's face.

He's looking back at him, eyes dark and almost feral, face flushed from exertion and his hair is a mess and droplets of sweat are running down his temples.

'Riku.' he says, simply, his chest almost expanding from the realisation of Riku's _want_ , and he wants him back so much he doesn't even know what to do next. He closes the distance between them and kisses him, chastely, as if to test the waters, and he sees Riku's eyelashes fluttering shut as he opens his mouth in acceptance.

The kiss is sloppy, wet and the angle is awkward, so Sora slowly untangles himself from under Riku's hold, all the while trying not to break the kiss. He drops down to his back, brings Riku down with him and opens his legs so as to give way to Riku's cock. 'Get back in' he says, almost as a command, and Riku doesn't need to be asked twice. He rams back in, maybe a bit too rashly, and it is a bit unnerving, all of this, the sex and the kissing — it is messy, violent and Sora can't think of anything he's wanted more than this. Riku presses hot kisses all over his mouth and throat, and his hands, his _hands_ seem to caress every inch of his body. They are hot and calloused and they raise shivers on every path he traces over his skin.

'I'm —' Riku breathes, barely forming any words, and Sora looks up at him, stunned for a moment at the beauty of his best friend. 'I won't — last long.'

'It's okay' Sora says, pressing a kiss to his forehead, before diving back to his lips, biting them to entice his friend to take him harder. The pleasure is more than he could have ever imagined, and his cock throbs painfully against his stomach, almost begging to be taken care of. Riku hides his head against Sora's throat, breathes him in and moans his relief against his neck - a long, aching howl of pleasure as he thrusts almost painfully his seed inside of him. The thought of it - oh, the thought of it sends Sora to the verge, and he almost loses all sense of self as he moans and tries to rock his pelvis against Riku's weight, searching for more friction, for something to _complete_ his need of him - and Riku seems to understand his cry for help. He peels himself off of Sora and presses soft kisses agains throat, his jaw and lips as he runs his familiar hand against Sora's painfully hard length. Sora doesn't need much, and he comes in a long exhale after a few strokes - the bliss seems to be unending, and Riku doesn't spare his fondling and carries on until there is nothing left of him to spill on their joined chests.

They lie on the bed for a few minutes, slowly evening out their breathing. Riku has wrapped his arm around Sora's middle while his head rests over his chest. Sora holds it close it to heart, his fingers tangling themselves in the mess that has become Riku's hair, and he thinks — he doesn't think he has ever been happier. And there is something new about all of this, the touching and cuddling that makes the truth blurt out of his lips:

'I don't think I have ever been happier'

Riku doesn't say anything, not for a long minute. Sora can feel his body freezing against his, and he almost regrets his words - until Riku looks up at him, and Sora has never seen him look so shy.

'I know I haven't' he says, tentatively. And Sora thinks, this is it. He guides him back to his lips, and cannot help a tear to roll down his cheek as Riku's arms close in on him, holding him safe from the worlds.


End file.
